Me. At least after what I've been through.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I still have a little drunk in my system
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Randomize
