Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
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