Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize