Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize