so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
