Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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