laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
well you can't waste a boner
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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