I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize
