Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize