do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
