how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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