the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
