As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
