I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
