Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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