wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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