It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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