i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize