You work out of a Hotel?
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
