stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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