why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Found your dick twin last night
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
