there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Slut skills are useful in every country.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
