It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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