He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
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She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I have post one night stand depression
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