so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Randomize
