GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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