How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
