Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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