I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
