your thong is hanging out like whoa
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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