I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Randomize
