Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
