Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
