Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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