You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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