she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize