I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize