at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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