We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
