No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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