i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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