i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize