And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
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