Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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