Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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