??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
