I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize