He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
