Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
