Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Of course I have a pirate flag
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
