She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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