Only a mothe r could love this liver
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
