About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.