It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Randomize
